Suburban Spirit World
A One-Act Dark Comedy; John C. Edwards Undergraduate Prize Play Winner
An excerpt starting from page 7. The format has been altered to fit this layout.
Jeremy and Caleb are ghosts who cannot be seen nor heard by Lisa, Abby, or Tori.
***
LISA. I don’t know... Something feels weird about this house. Like it’s not completely... empty. (For a moment, Lisa looks directly where Jeremy is standing.)
ABBY. Don’t say that!
CALEB. Okay, seriously, what is going on?
JEREMY. That is Lisa Campbell. (Jeremy walks up to her and studies her face closely.)
CALEB. One of your three friends? She’s cute.
JEREMY. (Swooning:) Yeah.
TORI. Hey Lisa, didn’t you know one of the guys that lived here? Jared?
LISA. Jeremy... I didn’t know him very well.
CALEB. Ooh... ouch.
JEREMY. Wait, what?
TORI. Wanna get to know him better? (Tori waves the ouija board at Lisa.)
JEREMY. We sat next to each other all through fifth grade!
ABBY. Didn’t he have a brother... Caleb? Caleb was hot.
CALEB. Nice!
JEREMY. I gave you my Gogurt every day! How do you not remember me?
TORI. (To Abby:) Maybe you can talk to Caleb then?
ABBY. I’m not touching that thing!!
LISA. Isn’t it kind of in poor taste? I mean they just died last-- (Lisa moves and walks directly into Jeremy. He falls to the ground instantly and she continues moving forward, but she’s thrown off.) Whoa.
TORI. What? (Jeremy starts writhing around on the ground, clearly in discomfort.)
CALEB. What??
LISA. I just got that feeling... Like I just walked through someone... It was so weird. I don’t know, has that ever happened to you?
TORI. Totally.
ABBY. (Overlapping:) Umm, no!
CALEB. Are you alright!?
JEREMY. That. (Pause.) WAS THE STRANGEST FEELING IN THE WORLD.
CALEB. Like good strange or--
JEREMY. BAD STRANGE. BAD STRANGE.
***
Want to see what happens next? You can find the rest of the script below!
Photo by Ron St. Jean Photography. "Suburban Spirit World" performed at UNH in the Fall of 2019.